Everything

I only have three finals to go until THE END OF SCHOOL. But I believe the more important date would be Hannah's arrival. Five days to go until I am reunited with the most wonderful person to ever walk the earth. (I'm not talking about Matt Smith--but he's a close second). I suppose I shouldn't get too excited until Tuesday 3:00 p.m., but fuck the rules, let me have my moment of joy. Although I'm terribly sad to not return to Cheley, the vicissitude makes it more special. After reading The Interestings I have become more aware of the innocence felt when at camp. The "naive" notion that everything is possible when immured within mountains. Although the author makes an interesting point (see what I did there?) I don't think that feeling comes from naivety. I think it is the unobstructed mentality of someone not yet plagued with the actual naivety that comes from becoming an adult. The naivety of being overly judgemental and frankly, confining to easily to the rules of society. People assume teenagers are the ones trying to fit in, but I see it as the adults. Enough for now.

HASHTAG MAINSTREAM

You can't repeat the past

Somehow I have this vision that if I wait long enough, everything will turn out the way I want it to. As if time will build everything into the perfect life I've envisioned for myself. Like Lillie pointed out earlier in her blog, I can't spend the present waiting for the future. Thing will not be worked out for themselves. I even feel stupid as I write this. It doesn't seem like my life is messed up. It doesn't seem like I have anything to mourn. But I keep waiting for something to happen that will make waking up in the morning happy. I am holding on right now to the hope that something is waiting for me in my future. It's late, and I know I'm just babbling mindlessly, but I don't want to spend my whole high school career in anticipation for college, and then disappoint myself with reality. I guess I need to get to bed now.

WHY OF COURSE YOU CAN

Final-ly

Normally at this point in the year, with only 2 weeks of school left, I would be over the moon. But two major things have corrupted these feelings:

1. It is 50 degrees and raining outside
2. Finals are coming up, and I don't know what to do with myself

Honestly, you'd think things would be dying down in time for finals, but our teachers don't seem to want to kill the workload until right before finals. We have the first part of our history final in TWO DAYS. I don't understand why they think cramming before the end of the year will help us learn. As Lillie said on her blog, do I really want my kids to grow up in a world where it's more about tests and grades than creativity and ability to learn? As Mr. Doelger wisely put it, Lakeside never wanted to be a college prep school, because they wanted students to learn for the quality of information rather than the quantity. I talk too much about school.... I'm so excited for Hannah to come! I am literally counting down the days. While it doesn't make up for not being able to go to Cheley this year, it's certainly nice to be seeing her for the first time in a year. Anyways, just 3 more years of high school to go--I'm praying I'll make it through.

LIVIN' ON A PRAYER

Shed some light on it

So, yesterday, after a few tedious minutes of attempting to hold my letter up to the light to see through it, wondering if the envelope bore good news or bad, I ultimately decided to open it. I was not disappointed; you're reading the blog post of the newest BP. fashion board member! You should be honored. (As I am). Just thought you should know, my international readers.

Things this experience has taught me:

1. perseverance will get you where you need to go

2. don't doubt the power of will to win over the power of fright

SEE YOU ON THE RUNWAY

Words of Wisdom

Just a little truth for y'all:

1. Saying "y'all" is just so not cool

2. Decide whether or not you're angrier about losing someone's trust, or the consequences that go with what they said.

HASHTAG TRUTH

Spring fever

The first real month of spring has passed, and already I am praying for summer. (Although the weather has been getting cooler... grr, Seattle.) Can I please just skip the last two weeks of school? Finals can go be murdered and thrown in a deep, dark hole next to Alison  Delaurenti's house. I would have expected the weeks leading up to finals to be a little more lenient and give us time to study, but apparently that would be too much to ask. *Sigh*. I'm done complaining about school for now-- it's boring and pitiful. But what else do I have to talk about? My undying need for a bathing suit? Summer is fast approaching and all I have to wear is a sorry-ass, mix & matched bathing suit consisting of a too-small top that I stole from Sara many summers ago (sorry Sara, because apparently you read this sometimes), and bottoms that are slightly too dark and don't match the top. I don't know where to get one. My life problems are pretty sad. I do have other problems, but not ones that I would share on here. In any case, this post has been boring enough. Next I'll post about the time I watched paint dry!

STAY TUNED

P.S. Things I learned from this experience:

1. I literally have zero social life right now

2. School will be the death of me

3. SUMMER IS A LIE in Seattle

Hello, world. (Wat'cha knowin'?)

I recently discovered that it's possible to see page views from different countries. I currently have 3 from South Korea (what the actual f---), 4 from Germany, 87 from the US (mostly me, I presume), and 2 from Alaska. Well, I just want to say "Hello!" Also my blog is not that interesting so just... what? Things this experience has taught me:

1. The internet is a weird place. (Wait. I already knew that)

2. My blog is really boring.

CHEERS, INTERNATIONAL READERS!