Everything

I only have three finals to go until THE END OF SCHOOL. But I believe the more important date would be Hannah's arrival. Five days to go until I am reunited with the most wonderful person to ever walk the earth. (I'm not talking about Matt Smith--but he's a close second). I suppose I shouldn't get too excited until Tuesday 3:00 p.m., but fuck the rules, let me have my moment of joy. Although I'm terribly sad to not return to Cheley, the vicissitude makes it more special. After reading The Interestings I have become more aware of the innocence felt when at camp. The "naive" notion that everything is possible when immured within mountains. Although the author makes an interesting point (see what I did there?) I don't think that feeling comes from naivety. I think it is the unobstructed mentality of someone not yet plagued with the actual naivety that comes from becoming an adult. The naivety of being overly judgemental and frankly, confining to easily to the rules of society. People assume teenagers are the ones trying to fit in, but I see it as the adults. Enough for now.

HASHTAG MAINSTREAM

You can't repeat the past

Somehow I have this vision that if I wait long enough, everything will turn out the way I want it to. As if time will build everything into the perfect life I've envisioned for myself. Like Lillie pointed out earlier in her blog, I can't spend the present waiting for the future. Thing will not be worked out for themselves. I even feel stupid as I write this. It doesn't seem like my life is messed up. It doesn't seem like I have anything to mourn. But I keep waiting for something to happen that will make waking up in the morning happy. I am holding on right now to the hope that something is waiting for me in my future. It's late, and I know I'm just babbling mindlessly, but I don't want to spend my whole high school career in anticipation for college, and then disappoint myself with reality. I guess I need to get to bed now.

WHY OF COURSE YOU CAN

Final-ly

Normally at this point in the year, with only 2 weeks of school left, I would be over the moon. But two major things have corrupted these feelings:

1. It is 50 degrees and raining outside
2. Finals are coming up, and I don't know what to do with myself

Honestly, you'd think things would be dying down in time for finals, but our teachers don't seem to want to kill the workload until right before finals. We have the first part of our history final in TWO DAYS. I don't understand why they think cramming before the end of the year will help us learn. As Lillie said on her blog, do I really want my kids to grow up in a world where it's more about tests and grades than creativity and ability to learn? As Mr. Doelger wisely put it, Lakeside never wanted to be a college prep school, because they wanted students to learn for the quality of information rather than the quantity. I talk too much about school.... I'm so excited for Hannah to come! I am literally counting down the days. While it doesn't make up for not being able to go to Cheley this year, it's certainly nice to be seeing her for the first time in a year. Anyways, just 3 more years of high school to go--I'm praying I'll make it through.

LIVIN' ON A PRAYER

Shed some light on it

So, yesterday, after a few tedious minutes of attempting to hold my letter up to the light to see through it, wondering if the envelope bore good news or bad, I ultimately decided to open it. I was not disappointed; you're reading the blog post of the newest BP. fashion board member! You should be honored. (As I am). Just thought you should know, my international readers.

Things this experience has taught me:

1. perseverance will get you where you need to go

2. don't doubt the power of will to win over the power of fright

SEE YOU ON THE RUNWAY

Words of Wisdom

Just a little truth for y'all:

1. Saying "y'all" is just so not cool

2. Decide whether or not you're angrier about losing someone's trust, or the consequences that go with what they said.

HASHTAG TRUTH

Spring fever

The first real month of spring has passed, and already I am praying for summer. (Although the weather has been getting cooler... grr, Seattle.) Can I please just skip the last two weeks of school? Finals can go be murdered and thrown in a deep, dark hole next to Alison  Delaurenti's house. I would have expected the weeks leading up to finals to be a little more lenient and give us time to study, but apparently that would be too much to ask. *Sigh*. I'm done complaining about school for now-- it's boring and pitiful. But what else do I have to talk about? My undying need for a bathing suit? Summer is fast approaching and all I have to wear is a sorry-ass, mix & matched bathing suit consisting of a too-small top that I stole from Sara many summers ago (sorry Sara, because apparently you read this sometimes), and bottoms that are slightly too dark and don't match the top. I don't know where to get one. My life problems are pretty sad. I do have other problems, but not ones that I would share on here. In any case, this post has been boring enough. Next I'll post about the time I watched paint dry!

STAY TUNED

P.S. Things I learned from this experience:

1. I literally have zero social life right now

2. School will be the death of me

3. SUMMER IS A LIE in Seattle

Hello, world. (Wat'cha knowin'?)

I recently discovered that it's possible to see page views from different countries. I currently have 3 from South Korea (what the actual f---), 4 from Germany, 87 from the US (mostly me, I presume), and 2 from Alaska. Well, I just want to say "Hello!" Also my blog is not that interesting so just... what? Things this experience has taught me:

1. The internet is a weird place. (Wait. I already knew that)

2. My blog is really boring.

CHEERS, INTERNATIONAL READERS!

Post traumatic test disorder

Has anybody ever been diagnosed with that? Maybe I'll be the first. After 3 tests and an hour of studying I am left with a jam-packed brain, and 3 more hours of homework. The first blissful minutes of  arriving at home are the best. I am greeted by a tail-wagging pup, lots of face licks, and a few minutes of eating rice cakes and cheese. (My snack weakness-- I'm telling you, I can eat 5 rice cakes in an hour). To put a cherry on top of the bowl of mushy oatmeal that resembles my day, it's 64 degrees and sunny, still! Bien que je sois heureuse, je suis triste aussi. Sunshine+HW, and more studying means I have to stay inside, being constantly tortured by the bright rays of golden light. Things this experience has taught me:

1. Sun, although a rare and beautiful thing in Seattle, is a torturous thing.

2. Just because you have a test, don't expect the teacher to give you a day off from HW

HELP, DOCTOR

Lazy as a daisy, busy as a bee

I'm not quite sure how to describe this day... due to the fact that I have 3 tests (postponed my fourth!) it is certainly a busy day. But keeping in mind that I am sitting down the whole day on account of these tests, it is also a lazy day. Mentally exhausting, physically fattening. It is 70 degrees and sunny outside. I feel like it should be illegal to lock us inside for tests on this rare, beautiful day. So for now I'll float on a cloud of laziness until my english test rolls around. Happy times. Things this has taught me:

1. Just because it's a beautiful day does not mean the whole world stops. (Although I wish it would)

2. Summer can't come soon enough

HAPPY HUMP DAY

Lucubration

Lucubration--(noun) Laborious study or thought, especially at night.

That's what'll be going on in my room for the next two nights. It sounds dirtier than it really is, trus me. Lakeside, being the overachieving school it is, loves to dump multiple tests at once on its poor students. It seems as if my teachers have not been conferring, because they all decided to assign tests the same week. On wednesday, I have a test EVERY. SINGLE. PERIOD. Granted, it's a long period day, so that adds up to only four tests, but I'd say that's still a record breaking number. I have a french test, algebra test, biology test, and an english test. It's expected that each one will take up the entire period, leaving me with a measly 40 minutes for lunch. Advice I have for my friends on wednesday: Don't talk to me. I have made a 2 page, handprint study guide for english and biology, studied on quizlet for French, and neglected to care about algebra.
Things this has taught me:

1. Don't doubt the power of teachers to give you huge tests and projects in the same week

2. Don't doubt the stupidity of teachers to give you huge tests and projects in the same week.

FML

Bucket List

Bucket list-- Summer 2013 (and beyond)

1. Go to a music festival (Sasquatch!)

2. Host a big party

3. Visit Paris with Hannah

4. Swim in the Dead Sea

5. Buy a Polaroid camera and take pictures all over Seattle

6. Go inside the Russian Consulate

7. See the Russian guys again (Lillie) ;)

8. Perfect my inward without being scared

9. Throw a going away part-ay for Sara and Anabel

10. Re-build the hot springs at Sinclair

11. Become fluent in French

12. Get on the BP. Fashion board

13. Return to Japan

14. Watch a sunset and a sunrise on the beach

15. Watch "The Bucket List"

16. Watch every "Harry Potter" movie in one day

17. Re-connect with all my old friends

18. Jump on Ivy's trampoline on a rainy day, then have hot chocolate and ramen

To be continued...

Short skirt and a long jacket

While Sara was at our house today, we decided to go down to Madison Park for lunch. I went to get dressed, and came back wearing the tunic I got from Japan with a pair of grey leggings. As soon as I walked into the room, Sara exclaimed how slutty I looked. Sara has a lying voice, so I immediately laughed and sat down. She kept exchanging those supposed-to-be-discreet-but-not-actually looks with Cecile, and I laughed at her. But as she and Cecile continued to bend over and lift up my dress so they could see my if the butt was see-through, and other sexual harassment-sounding things, I laughed even more. I came back into the room 5 minutes later wearing a crop top, leggings, and 5 inch pumps. Sara didn't even look up. Haha :)

Things this has taught me:

1. Sara likes to make fun of me, but only when I react to it. Just play along. 

2. The only people who actually care when I wear short dresses are Sara and Cecile

Anyways-- whateva, whateva I do what I want. 

Carpe Diem

For most people, "carpe diem" is something people strive for, rather than an accidental occurrence. But, in our case (Lillie, Cecile and I), the latter was true. A normal night walking down to (blech) Mad Pizza, or "Bad Pizza" with Lillie turned into an exciting escapade, which I certainly didn't see coming. We stopped at McGilvra on our way back up to Lillie's house so we could catch up on some Jamie drama. After a few minutes of ragging on Jamie ("Jerky"), we were ready to go back up. It was getting dark, and the school lights had turned off. We were halfway up the street when Cecile turned and saw something on the roof. "Are those people?" She had asked, with disbelief. I replied without looking-- "Um... no". But I turned out of curiosity, and sure enough, 3-4 teenage stoners were huddled high on the school roof, a lit match illuminating the scene. Out of curiosity and excitement, we decided we had to head back. Being the awkwardly terrified teenagers we were, we clung onto each other-- or, rather, Lillie clung on to me, cutting off what little blood circulation I had left-- as we tiptoed around the back entrance of the school. This terrifyingly real experience taught me a few things:

1. I definitely need to seize the day whenever I get the chance-- a little excitement never hurt anyone! (Except for the hot girl in a horror movie)

2. If you hear a gunshot when there are stoners sitting on the roof... RUN FOR YOUR F-ING LIFE

Of course, in hindsight, it seems as if we were exaggerating this tale a bit. What sounded life threatening at the time could have been a mere misplaced foot. But because this makes my life sound more interesting, we'll just say it was a stoner holding an ak-47 out for our lives.

In any case, whenever you get the chance, wherever you are...

CARPE DIEM